I would like to forgive my body
if only I knew how.
Perhaps I should write a list
of everything I dislike
and light it with a match;
watch it smoulder with eager eyes
and a glass of wine.
Or I should write a list
of my favourite parts
and scrawl them across every mirror.
I worry the first list
would be too long,
and the second, too short.
I worry thinking about my body
as if it is a separate entity
living in a world of acceptance
I cannot touch,
only makes it worse.
I have equipped myself
with a magnifying glass
to examine every stretch mark,
freckle and vein.
I forget to thank my body
for growing and changing;
livid lines of time.
I forget to thank each freckle,
join them dot to dot
and appreciate the constellations
written into my skin.
I forget to thank the rivulets of blood
running down well-trodden paths
to service my heart and whole;
even on the mornings
I vowed never to see.
I would like to forgive my body
for being soft, squishy,
too skinny or undefined,
for keeping my heart in a cage,
for desiring sleep
and balanced meals.
Reading this open letter
to my bones and organs
it seems I’ve approached
forgiveness all wrong.
My body is the victim
and I am the predator
with a food chain of one.
I need to begin again,
cross out every line
and ask for permission.
I would like to ask myself
to forgive and forget
all of the things
I have and haven’t done,
for all of the times
I’ve believed I am not
good enough.
Poem: © Kristiana Reed 2019
I love this so much! X
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Thank you Helena ♥️
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This is an absolutely terrific piece of writing. Compelling and impressively composed, each stanza builds on the last, until it comes to those killer last lines. Awe-inspiring work Kristiana!
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Thank you very very much!!
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